Trying to have good relationships with the people around you, building one is a thing that every one of us is striving to achieve. Sadly for one or more reasons, not every one of us is able to do this. Some people have personal problems that make this hard or in some cases impossible to do. Well for most people there are some things that can help them improve themselves and their social skills in that regard. By doing so it will help them live better lives. Also, build stronger relationships with people around them and even build new ones.
Body language is a very important social skill to develop. It’s essential to be able to communicate effectively with people. If you feel anxious other people will see this first from your body language. Try to stay confident and maintain eye contact with the person you are talking with. Also, try to speak to people with the same tone they speak to you. Don’t be louder than them or try to not talk too faster than them. Build a rhythm in conversations. Observe how other people communicate with each other. Try practising this in front of a mirror and work on your weaknesses. It may sound strange but it works.
Keep conversations going
For some people, this is probably the biggest problem. Keeping conversations long enough. Depending on who are you speaking with, this can vary because everyone is interested in different subjects. Try to identify what are the subjects that are interesting to the person you speak with and see what of the themes he is into and if you have any kind of knowledge – dig into it. This is one of the basic ways to improve the length of the conversations.
Spend some time on your looks before you go out. Try out something new like a hairstyle, a new shirt, shoes. Develop this as a habit before you go out. This will not only make you look better but it will also boost your confidence, and make you more social. Another way to improve your looks is to stay in shape, hit the gym. This is one of the best confidence boosters you can find. Try to organize your life in such a way that you have the time for at least one of those things. And try to smile at people more often, this will make you more welcoming for a conversation.
People won’t come to you all the time, so you will have to approach them first. Look confident and don’t hesitate much or you risk looking awkward and that will put you in a very uncomfortable situation if you already started a conversation with someone. Start off a casual conversation maybe ask a few questions, what are they doing for a living, etc. Analyze if the person you talk to is interested in continuing the conversation. If not then you didn’t lose anything so keep trying maybe the next person will be different and you will gain more experience and even maybe a new friend.
If you are really determined to keep trying, it’s just a matter of time before you achieve the goal of socializing to an extent of feeling comfortable enough to speak to people with confidence. Being social is just a skill like many others and with practice, you will become better and better just don’t give up. Be patient and in time good things will happen and you will be not only more confident but also motivated to learn more about being a social person.
Advises for improving your social skills:
- Try to stay relaxed or if you can’t, at least give yourself a relaxed look it will make you more approachable and easy to talk with.
- Choose the people you want to start a conversation with people you think looks welcoming for conversation.
- Don’t be afraid of failure – you will learn from it much more than from success like everything else in life.
- Remember that people are strange – this is what I always repeat myself when I look stupid and do something strange. Just make yourself look like you know what you are doing and do not give a care about what other people think.